I have a request…

It’s regarding the subject I keep coming back to.

Magic.

Not the “make shit disappear” kind, the other kind. Although that kind is a bit more difficult to define.

Here is Merriam-Webster’s attempt:

“An extraordinary power or influence seemingly from a supernatural source. Something that seems to cast a spell.”

I don’t think that does it justice, though…

I think it is impossible to define magic, just as it is to define love or evil or god. But this is what makes us human, I suppose. Our inherent need to define everything around us- to place all things firmly and tangibly into reality- I believe is one our greatest tragedies…magic’s nemesis.Most things clearly defined leave little room for the extraordinary.
– b. breazeale

For me, it’s a feeling or experience…or how an experience makes you feel. It’s electric, exhilarating- the sound of waves crashing against the shore. Or it’s soft, tranquil- a hummingbird in flight.

It disregards time, is indifferent to circumstance, and deems logic absurd. It’s elusive, fickle, fleeting- sometimes bold, sometimes mysterious- but always undeniable. It can be terrifying, detonating the safe place we created that lulled us into complacency.

But what is it, exactly?

My experience of it is the warm glow of a harvest moon, a flower drenched in sunlight, and a sky full of stars. It’s the call of a kookaburra, the wind dancing on the ocean, and the smell of morning in spring. It’s a rustle in the trees when there is no breeze or a whisper that brushes your cheek when there is no one to speak.

It’s love, feeling it, unabashedly, and seeing it reflected back in the eyes of the person you want to spend the rest of your days with.

None of these experiences are lost on me. I see magic all around me, constantly. Except for the last one. That one I can’t seem to find.

I’ve had glimpses of it. But it’s proven to be more of a disappearing act…not the kind of magic I had in mind. Now, I’m finding myself looking around for the little man behind the curtain. Except there are no ruby slippers or home to go back to.

Courage, though, that I have…and a brain. But a new heart, that one I’ll take. I think mine has permanently lost its shape- too many cracks, too many pieces left behind for those who didn’t know what they’d found.

Of all things intangible, magic might be the most elusive. It is a very real force that influences almost every moment of our childhood, allowing us to navigate our world curious, uninhibited, full of wonder, and open to every possibility. But this elusive force will inevitably succumb to its nemesis: reality. We all have to grow up, right? We all must face reality.
So, like most people, magic eluded me for decades, until reality had sucked all the life out of me, and I realized that the only one who could save me had gone missing.
– b. breazeale

Love and magic, the elusive duo I have risked so much for, lost so much for…and hope is quickly following suit.

But it does exist, right? I mean, you’ve heard about it, haven’t you? The sweet, elderly couple who still dance in the kitchen, the guy who flies across the globe to win her back, the seemingly impossible love that persevered against all odds…the chance meeting that turns into that epic love story.

I understand it’s rare. It means risk, vulnerability, potential rejection, and unbearable pain. It’s terrifying, really. We now know the stakes, and they are high. We have tasted heartbreak, and it is brutal.

But we can make a choice. To take the risk, to heal and grow, love better, feel more. Or, we can retreat, build up our walls and remain in the realm of comfortable, safe…ordinary.

I know you skeptics and non-believers out there are shaking your heads. This isn’t a fairytale. No one is going to climb up my balcony and whisk me off to happily-ever-after. This is reality.

I’ve heard you, I’ve actually dated you. You have adequately presented your case- a convincing one to be sure- and your actions have been deafening. Your work is done here. So as you were.

But for you believers, can you help a romantic out here? Because she is, in fact, starting to feel hopeless.

Show me it exists. Tell me your stories, or stories of someone you know, or ones you’ve heard- whether they be epic or seemingly small, day-to-day things you do to sustain it.

Please, for all of us who refuse to settle, help us believe…magic is real and love can be extraordinary.

Because honestly, why waste our time on anything less?

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15 thoughts on “I have a request…

  1. HI Brooke. I admire your courage in being vulnerable and asking for help. I love that you still believe in magic. Maybe that is your door to finding shared love with another. It seems that would build a momentum and flow. And feel free to ignore my tips, as I’ve not found that shared love either. Big hugs!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Brad, I wouldn’t dare discount your wisdom. So many of us haven’t found it. But I think we forget to look. That’s the conundrum, isn’t it? How to keep looking when we start to doubt if it actually exists. That’s why I wrote this. I know it does, I just need to be reminded. I’m hoping this inspires people to share their stories. I know they are out there. We’ll have tales to tell, too, Brad. You can’t find the beauty and magic in nature like you do and not find it in love. Huge hug back to you!

      Liked by 2 people

    • This made me laugh out loud. I’m humbled and tickled by the mention.

      I’d love to call it magic. I’d like to write a book on it, maybe tell the world how to chart the course. But I wouldn’t know. It doesn’t come mystically. I’ve taken my knocks, had heartaches, have them still. There are times I don’t believe it’s worth it.

      Everything we want, though, requires the same ingredients: knowledge of what we want, endurance through hard times, and sacrifice. Nothing is ever gained without giving up something else. I think that’s true.

      I love you guys. Persevere, and keep that hope alive. That is the last ingredient absolutely necessary: never give up on hope. If I believe in anything in this crazy universe, it is the concept of hope.

      Liked by 3 people

  2. The most intense relationship I ever had with a boy was with Jason Wallz, in grade 3. We were hot and heavy, wrote love notes to each other, and he even carved me a dog out of soap. Wish I still had it but I threw it out in my 20’s because I did remarkably dumb things that decade. At one point he stopped kissing me because he was worried I was going to get pregnant. I will never forget that conversation, I was terrified and disappointed. Llhonda Olhauser then moved to town, and he set his sights on her. I was crushed. But one day for lunch we went to his house to eat, and I met his mom. When I laid eyes on her, and she spoke to me, I forgot all about Jason and Llonda. I was smitten instantly. That’s how I know there is such a thing as magic. When you least expect it, it shows up, heals your heart, reveals the truth, and shows you who you are.​

    Liked by 5 people

  3. I’m going to consider this request for a while, but I will post a few quick thoughts. The first thing I always say is “I don’t believe in magic.” But I don’t mean that cold-heartedly, to dismiss the notion. I don’t believe in gods, either, but I never disparage another’s belief in such things. I think belief is wonderful (if not used to harm others).

    But I can’t deny that things just happen. Mrs C and I talked about the Goethe quote recently (my all-time favorite): “Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.” There’s that magic word again.

    But the rest of that quote means just as much to me, if not more:

    “Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back — concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:

    that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way.”

    Now Providence is, by definition, “the hand of god.” But it is the committed/initiative part of the equation that has always helped me. When we know what we want we begin to notice things like never before. Magic? I don’t think so; those things were there all along but our focus was off. But “the moment one definitely commits oneself” the focus is restored.

    Never give up hope, Brooke. Know that love and magic and the greatest life you can imagine is available to you. Make sure what you hope for is truly what you want. Focus on that outcome, and set your intention. Persevere. Cut out what is not necessary, what is in the way.

    Howard Jones once sang, “A thousand skeptic hands won’t keep us from the things we plan, unless we’re clinging to the things we prize.”

    That’s my “short” take. 😂

    Later I’ll tell you about the time I did believe in magic because I was challenged to conjure it, and it came. On to work for now, though!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Suspension of disbelief. We do that for stories, but in real life? As children we do it naturally. I wonder if our ability, as adults, to allow the impossible to exist, just for a moment is something we should strive to recapture.

    Here’s an excerpt from my novel The Gribble’s Eye:

    “There’s something about a child.” The Professor’s lecture voice rose as he warmed to his subject. “They innocently suspend all judgement. Children have few predispositions or prejudices. They’re open and inquisitive. Adults, on the other hand, are crammed so full of their learned and self-imagined views of the world they can’t possibly be taken in by the concept of whimsy or the spurious flight of a fairie creature.” He flurried his hands like flapping wings. “Or even wishes made upon stars. Only starlight wishes, evoked by children, carry weight. A wish by one such as you or I is nothing but a careless desire brushed aside as impractical. But, to a child, a wish upon a star sends shivers into the world. Vibrations through existence. And deep within, entities exist, beings that listen to such vibrations, beings who hear the wishes of children.”

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I don’t have any words of wisdom, but you know I believe the magic is inside of you, it is who you are, not something you have to look for. As for love and the magic that comes with it, only you know what that looks like for you, what it feels like. For me, it was feeling so comfortable, safe and at ease, I realized that this love thing doesn’t have to be hard, shouldn’t require work. The first time I met Joe, I felt a warmth from him that I had never felt, a sincerity that can’t be faked. On our first date, I remember sitting across from him, so relaxed and thinking…..this is exactly how it is supposed to be. So many nights, when we are watching TV, I turn to look at him and think…I am so glad it is him sitting next to me.

    Before Joe, I had a lot of heartbreak. I tried again and again to make love work, but when I met Joe and didn’t have to try, I knew the magic bit had happened.

    You have such a blazing and beautiful road ahead of you Brooke and you are meant to travel it with someone. You will find each other. I know it.

    Like

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