Sometimes You Can’t Convince Love to Stay (Thought Catalog)

Very excited to share with all of you my first published article posted yesterday in Thought Catalog… small, scary first step, but it’s a start and most likely would not have happened without all of your encouraging words, support, and guidance.  Hope you enjoy…

Sometimes You Can’t Convince Love to Stay

Direct link to article below:

Sometimes You Can’t Convince Love To Stay


3 thoughts on “Sometimes You Can’t Convince Love to Stay (Thought Catalog)

  1. Really? Of course I don’t know you. But, as a mother and advocate for women and children, I can unabashedly say – THIS IS NOT LOVE!
    I’m sorry, but although it sounds like you are hurt, I can’t understand one thing – your description says you are about “empowering women and children”.
    Do you think being involved with another woman’s husband (who has kids you say) empowers either?
    Should we feel sorry for you? How do you think they felt? How about this guy’s wife (separated or not)? Where is the sympathy for them? Are they to blame for the selfishness of you two? I don’t recall you mentioning anything about how they might have felt or any care or concern for the collateral damage they likely sustained as a result of your encounter with “love”. This is unbelievable and I hope this is an April Fools joke. Because, I’m sorry but, this is about as self absorbed, selfish and unaware as it gets! I hope this article inspires women to avoid “men” like this (hardly a man) and watch out for selfish people’s complete inability to comprehend love. Please say you don’t truly believe this is love. I pray for this woman and her children, and for you too.


    • Thanks for taking the time to respond, Karla.

      I completely understand why you would react that way and why this topic is uncomfortable for you, especially if you have not been through a divorce or separation. Yes, you are right, the way we handled the situation was selfish. But I also think the reasons people stay or manipulate people to stay in a marriage/relationship can be selfish. I do not address those things here because that is not what the article is about. This article is not about infidelity or divorce or separations. This is article is about love.

      I don’t write for everyone to agree with me. I write to sort out my feelings, to offer my perspective and a million other reasons, none of which are to say that I know what truth is for anyone else. I just say what my truth is. Maybe it helps people, maybe they disagree completely as you do. You have every right to have your opinion and your beliefs. I am not responding to prove you wrong. I am responding to try to clarify where I am coming from. But you don’t have to agree or respect that.

      As much as you might not understand it or agree, it impossible for you to know how I feel or don’t feel or if my experience of love is real or not real. That is like me telling you that you don’t truly feel/have faith for whomever/whatever you believe in and whomever/whatever you have faith/believe in isn’t real. We all believe differently, pray differently, make mistakes or ‘sin’ differently. Everyone has their own story, their own journey, and their own lessons that they need to learn.

      None of us are doing things perfectly. All of us are doing the best we can.

      I do not claim to have handled things perfectly or that I didn’t make mistakes. But, I think living our truth, being honest with ourselves and others, and being empathic and compassionate towards others, regardless of whether we agree with them or not, is empowering. Trying to convince the world that we don’t make mistakes or hiding them when we do is discounting our worth and making that work contingent on what others think. This is very dangerous and anything but empowering.

      So yes, I do believe what I feel is love. As I said, I wish I had a choice in the matter, but I don’t.

      Take care and I wish you and your family the best.


      • Brooke, what she said I agree with. I might know more about this situation than you realize. This man did the exact same thing a year before he summoned you with another woman and had absolutely no regard for his kids or wife. It was all about self gratification. This was not love at all. At least on his part. You were just part of his destructive behavior. I’m sorry you took the bait.


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