Drama Cleanse, day 14 & 15: Today, I shall not strive to be THE best.

  1. 5-minute Journal- check
  2. Podcast: Magic Lessons with Elizabeth Gilbert: Leap into the Fire
  3. Visualize for 5 minutes – This morning
  4. Exercise: Bar Method at home
  5. Goal- Start a meetup group to study Shakespeare: First one is tonight.

We made it to the halfway mark. For me, this feels miraculous after over a year of sporadic and then constant drama. It feels good to take charge and do things differently. I actually feel hopeful, which is much needed. So give yourself some love and well-earned accolades. Doing the work is not easy. Transforming bad habits/patterns into healthy ones is something few dare to do. Please don’t be discouraged if a mishap or two happened or some drama reared its head. This is a process. It’s a journey. Be gentle with yourself. You are headed in the right direction and you have the courage and capacity to stay the course.

NOTE: I think we have some momentum going here, so I am going to begin checking in just twice a week, on Mondays and Thursdays. I will be sure to fill you in on the things I learn and resources I find that I think will be most helpful.

Some thoughts:

Visualization. This morning it occurred to me that I was still in sleep mode and my level of focus and ability to stick to what I’m visualizing was minimal. So, I tried sitting up, even just in bed, and it was way more effective.

Exercise: Dramatic tendency intact.

Okay, so my toe isn’t broken. I might have been a bit over-dramatic. But the reality is, I am dramatic. And I’m actually okay with this. I have been criticized for this quality on several occasions. I beat myself up about it, and I tried to change it. But I decided to just embrace it.

How I see dramatic? Dramatic means passionate. Dramatic means excitement. Dramatic means taking the mundane, the ordinary, and transforming it into something with fervor. And think about how the descriptive adjective transforms the noun it proceeds?

Dramatic setting, dramatic comeback, dramatic improvement, dramatic entrancee.

I mean, wouldn’t you rather be in a dramatic setting vs just a setting, or dramatically improve vs. just improve.

So, my assessment of my toe was dramatic. But how much more intriguing was my recount of my yoga session? I broke my toe vs. I jammed it. In my defense, if I need one, which I don’t, it fucking hurt. And it was a color I have never seen before. And I have never had a ‘jammed or sprained or whatever it was’ toe.

Point is, for all of you I scared out of doing yoga, rest assured. It does not usually if ever involve broken bones. If you practice safely and in accordance with current physical state, all toes and extremities should remain intact.

I gave you a lil’ quote that makes me smile. Hopefully, it does the same for you on a Monday afternoon.

Podcast:

I listened to a short one this morning from Elizabeth Gilbert’s series. Again, I love these because she just selects normal, everyday people who are stuck in whatever endeavor they are pursuing.

This podcast was a session with a young poet, Hope, who wanted to take her poetry to the next level and pursue spoken word (which I love) and poetry slam sessions. She didn’t have the confidence or think she was talented enough to compete with other poets she was reading and hearing.

Gilbert dug until she was able to help Hope get to the core of it. Hope was paralyzed by fear of rejection. She ultimately believed that if someone told her she wasn’t good or talented, she would just stop. She would give up the thing she loved most.

Takeaway:

Gilbert challenged hope to ask herself the following question:

Who gets to decide if you are a good/talented/worthy’ ‘parent/artist/partner, etc.’?

It’s so true, right? Our barometer to our worthiness or level of skill/talent is almost always contingent on someone else’s opinion/assessment. It is almost instinctual because we are usually doing or being something for someone else, not for ourselves.

This hit me. Is this authentic? If I am living/doing for someone else, then I am altering who I truly am and what I can truly offer to fit the expectation or what I think the expectation is of another person. That is not who I am or what I have to offer, that is what they want and what they expect to receive. These are two very different things. It is also a recipe for disaster. Does this change with each person I aspire to please? If each person has their own desires and expectations, how can I possibly keep up with all the adaptations I would have to make to appease them?

It is our fear of losing their respect, attention, love, etc. and that our worst fear will be confirmed.

We are not good enough. We are not worthy.

Ironically, we often seek out the people who will confirm this. This is as painful as it is an easy out. It is an excuse to give up and avoid the fear of rejection. But it also stifles us and represses who we truly are and the gifts we have to offer. Which is worse?

Gilbert gave a good perspective and weapon to take action and give ourselves permission to ‘jump into the arena’.

We don’t have to be the best ‘artist/parent/partner’. And we don’t have to assume we are the worst. ‘There is enough real estate for both’.

Just like we have heard over and over, we just do the best we can do at whatever it is that we want to do/be most. This can free us from the pressure of being better than anyone else, of comparison. We just get to do what we do and know we are giving it everything we can. The reality is, this is more likely to land us among the greats than if we stay paralyzed for fear of failing/rejection.

So for the next few days, we will just do what we do simply for the reason that we love to do it, and we will give it our best.

Enjoy your next few days, drama free.

Optional steps/practices for next few days:

  1. Journal
  2. Podcast
  3. Visualize
  4. Exercise
  5. Step towards goal of choice
  6. Cleanse of your choosing
  7. Check off one thing on your list of things you don’t want to deal with.

Resources

  1. Journal App.fiveminutejournal.com
  2. Visualization: Mike Dooley (visualization tips: http://www.tut.com
  3. Podcast Referenced: Magic Lessons with Elizabeth Gilbert: Leap into the Fire
  4. Exercise: com/online
  5. Goal: com
  6. Cleanse products: Renew’s 7 day Rapid Cleanse, Milk Thistle, Probiotic, Apple Cider Vinegar: https://www.davidwolfe.com/1-tbsp-acv-eliminate-health-problems/

octopus

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