Drama Cleanse: Day 9

Sorry for the delay on this one, had a packed day. No drama, though, so on track. 

  1. 5-minute journal – check
  2. 5-minute visualization- morning in bed
  3. Podcast-finished- Success Talks: Mel Robbins on the 5 Second Rule
  4. Daily exercise- Biked to Bare3 class (http://barre3.com/studio-locations/cherry-creek-denver) Yoga this morning (core power)
  5. Step towards your goal: Reached out to one of my favorite authors to see if she would be open to providing some much-needed advice

NOTE: I bought a class pass for the first time, just to vary things up while I take a break from running. Bar classes are my favorite and I loved B3’s variation/approach. Yoga is the thing I probably need most and the hardest thing for me to get myself to do. It’s just hard to stay out of my head more than other things that are more physical/face paced. Yoga just forces you to feel and process your emotions, which is a bit grueling right now, but necessary.

Class Pass: I do recommend the class pass. You can always find really good deals on their site. I got a package of 5 for $30. I bar class is usually $20ish and Yoga is around $15-$20 per class, so great deal. Just know that only certain studios allow you to use it and it is usually for classes scheduled off hours.

Podcast: Finishing- Success Talks: Mel Robbins on the 5 Second Rule

NUTSHELL: An emphasis in the last part was about using the 5 Second Rule (counting 5-4-3-2-1 as a trigger to take action) to build your confidence. Makes sense. It helps you cultivate confidence by providing tangible steps to take action. Taking action reminds you that you are capable of more than you thought and breaks the pattern of inaction. This, in turn, boosts your confidence and belief in yourself. Even if you don’t get the outcome you wanted, your proved to you yourself that you survived, or that your actions led to the outcome that you did want. The simple action of ‘taking action’ is proof to yourself that you can do what is needed to move forward instead of staying stuck where you are.

She also touched on something that I am grappling with on a profound level. She addresses making heart-first decisions. When posed the question, “should the heart always be involved in decisions when it often ends in serious heartbreak?” Her response gave me heart. (especially because she is so pragmatic about things)

She responds, “We are born courageous”. Challenges are things that require courage, not things to overcome. So we have to re-frame difficulties as acts of courage instead of obstacles to overcome.

She asserts that when we listen to our instincts and go with our heart, things eventually turn out to be the best thing we could have done. Damaging mistakes are made when we go into our heads and start to question our heart. Heart decisions can be hard and complicated and have major ramifications- ending a relationship, starting a business, etc. The best thing you can do is to make decisions with your heart and then use your head to figure out the best way to get it done.

TAKEAWAY:

5-4-3-2-1 is a way to make you take the leap and then confirm that you had the courage to do it, and you landed, either on your feet or on your ass, but you landed. If it was the latter, you count to 1 again and you get back up. And you start to build the confidence to leap again until you eventually land on your feet. And you will.

I needed to hear this. Following my heart has always been my approach to life. And, yes, this approach has sometimes led to a broken heart. But it always turned out to be the right decision. There has always been a gift in it that was usually impossible to see when trying to heal my heart.

But I just did this when I had to make a major life-changing decision. There was so much risk involved on so many levels- the biggest one was the risk of getting my heart broken on a level that I didn’t know was possible. I got on my knees every day before taking the leap. I prayed, I meditated, I wrote, I sought advice from friends…everything I could possibly think to do to confirm what my heart was telling me. I leaped. And it feels like what was quite possibly the worst, most painful decision I have ever made.

I rethink what happened every day. What went wrong? How did I misread what my heart and my intuition were telling me? I went against sage advice, I went against reason and logic. I completely trusted what my heart was telling me to do.

I still can’t see the gift in it clearly. I know there is one. I am slowly starting to see what it is, but I just question why, at this point in my life, did the path to find that gift have to end in such a disaster and with so much pain.

What I do know is that I did in fact, leave out the other piece that is essential when making life-changing decisions. I did not use my head when planning on what steps to take to follow my heart. I ignored the obvious red flags/obstacles that were so blatant. I was excited and impatient and impulsive and didn’t take the time to look at the bigger picture. I wanted to paint it how I wanted it to unfold in that exact moment. I wish with all that I have that I would have used my head to come up with my action plan. I am not sure if things would have turned out differently. But I’m fairly certain that a lot less pain would have been suffered by and inflicted on everyone involved.

So, takeaway:  I will do my best to keep following my heart once it heals. And, next time, I will sit myself down and summon my head to join in on mapping out my plan of action.

Again, I encourage you all to listen to this one. It’s very enlightening, pragmatic, and completely doable.

Steps for Day 10: 

  1. journal
  2. visualize for 5 minutes
  3. listen to podcast
  4. exercise
  5. Do one thing, no matter how small, to take steps toward whatever it is you want to do or accomplish

Resources

Five-minute Journal: fiveminutejournal.com

Visualization: Mike Dooley (visualization tips: http://www.tut.com)

Podcast: Success Talks: Mel Robbins on the 5 Second Rule

Exercise: Bare3 class (http://barre3.com/studio-locations/cherry-creek-denver)

Class Pass: https://classpass.com/home

 

 

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